Building Relationships

During our #xtremesocial Twitter Chat on Thursday night, I asked a question about what you expect out of your social media efforts. It’s a simple question, but I think the response is more complicated. Most of you said you are “building relationships”. Personally, I think that is a bunch of bull!

Let me be clear, I am not here to say that “building relationships” is wrong, what I am asking is that you be honest and tell me what your real intentions are. When people respond like that, it almost sounds like they are using Twitter (or other SM sites) to make friends. I don’t believe that is true.

What I do believe, is that the “relationships” we are trying to build is more on a networking/sales level. Are you trying to build trust and authority? Are you trying to win eyeballs on your site? Are you trying to simply sell products/services?

Why is it so taboo to admit that you are trying to make sales? I just don’t understand that….

Response From Tee:

While I think Keith might be right on a portion of that, but building relationships, whether they are business or friendship is an integral part of using social media. That is why so many people have jumped on Facebook and Twitter.

Who says customers can’t still be your friends? Is there something wrong with being friends with someone that visits your blog, or buys your product?

I believe building a friendly relationship with your audience can be a key element to your social media and sales strategies. Sure, your end goal is to sell products and make money, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be approachable.

I say build lasting relationships using social media, build your audiences trust and you will find your business being more profitable. You will also meet some pretty darn interesting people, too!

Discussion:

What is your approach to building relationships using social media? Are you afraid to admit you are trying to sell something while building relationships? Let us know where you stand in the comments, and if you like the post please Re-Tweet and/or Share it on Facebook.

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38 Responses to Building Relationships

  1. Dave Doolin says:

    I'd like to say you're right, but frankly, my twitter history shows I do a lot more “relationship building” than I do sales, marketing or self-promoting. That's empirically verifiable.

    At this point, given the time I'm spending building out my “platform,” the relationships I've built on twitter are too emotionally important to me to put them at risk.

    However, friends buy my stuff, and I buy their stuff, so perhaps it's all working out anyway.

    Not sure there is a right answer here. Certainly the right question though.

  2. Keith Bloemendaal says:

    I agree with both sides on this, what I don't agree with is that people are scared to admit that there is another motive, to sell their products….

  3. Gurl says:

    First things first…The chat Thursday was a lot of fun and it was nice to see other people's thoughts on social media.

    Now, I can't see anyone literally using any social media site with only ONE goal in mind. Maybe at first, but the key to social media IS being social. Its forming relationships of MANY types. My response to that question reflected this. If I recall correctly, I said something along the lines of I use social media to meet like minded people, network with people with in my “industry”, and something else I don't recall.

    I've made some connections with people I do consider friends. I don't need to be able to meet up for coffee or what not to be able to say I consider someone to be a friend. As long as we have things in common, “speak” fairly often, help each other when and how we can, and enjoy each other's virutual company…we ARE friends.

    I've also connected with some people who, to date, are just industry contacts. People who I know can help me with my blogging efforts. I also connect with others who are pretty much in the same area of development that I am…so we become a sort of a mutual cheer leading group for each other.

    I wonder if the difference between the way we see social media reflects back to how we are in real life. I am a very social person by nature, where as maybe someone who isn't quite as social would end up being someone who mainly builds business relationships via social media without ever making that friendship connection?

  4. Keith Bloemendaal says:

    I agree that isn't one goal in mind, but why are people afraid to admit that they want to use social media to gain business? (not saying you are)

    I am a very social person too, I make friends easily, and am a very extroverted personality. That also helps me to network for business….

  5. Geoff Crane says:

    Dudes I loved this. I think everyone's use of social media is individual so there's no “way of doing it right”. You get out what you put in kind of thing.

    I also think a great many of us recognize the potential value in vehicles like Twitter, but are unsure how to tap it. There's more opinions on “how” out there than there are dead cells in my liver.

    A lot of people present themselves as being “all together” with their Twitter use, so when they use definitive statements like “I'm using Twitter to build relationships” it sounds good. But “building relationships” is a step towards reaching an outcome. If the outcome itself isn't defined, Twitter use will result in a lot of wheel-spinning and not a lot of value-making. Thanks for a great set-to! :-)

  6. Gurl says:

    If they are scared to so, they are idiots. I think that being totally honest about your intentions is the only way to get anywhere with whatever you may be doing in life.

    If you try to hide your intentions behind a fake friendship or fake persona, then you are only hurting your self. People buy from others they like..purchases are rarely made because of logic. Once people find out you've been blowing smoke, you've lost your customers.

    I'll be the first to admit I have goals that include pitching products to people who have agreed to let me do so. I will also use blog posts at times for the same thing..and that WILL end up in my twitter stream. Those who get upset with me for it will just have to deal. I will always be the same Gurl you've known for however long, no matter if you buy from me or not. Not becoming my customer won't change whatever relationship we have built.

  7. Keith Bloemendaal says:

    I agree that there is no “real” way of “doing it right”, I just think people should be more honest about their intentions.

  8. Geoff Crane says:

    Hrm. I wonder how many of them actually know what their intentions are? (Don't laugh LOL it's not as silly as it sounds) I believe a lot of folks see “building relationships” as some kind of nebulous end in itself, mainly because a lot of literature shouts out “Use Twitter! Build Relationships!”

    (Step 1: Steal Underpants; Step 2: ????; Step 3: Profit!)

  9. Bruce Teague says:

    I would say I'm trying to build trust at the moment. I also use it to learn from those smarter than me. I'm sure going forward I'll eventually expand my purposes on social media. I'm not trying to sell anything yet.

    I'm not spending time on social medial to have a jolly good time and make new cyber chaps to shoot the breeze with for no other reason than to be social. Nothing wrong with that I suppose, but I'm a busy guy. If I didn't see potential in SM from a business standpoint then I have other things I could be doing.

  10. SEO Education says:

    im totally disagree with you. we are here to build relationship not anything.

  11. Keith Bloemendaal says:

    I really don't understand what you are disagreeing with, sorry…

  12. Keith Bloemendaal says:

    Building trust is good too, I think using SM to do that can work well.

  13. Dennis Edell says:

    A large portion say one and think another, true enough. However those will be “found out” soon enough.

    The truly successful, those that will outlive the rest, KNOW the combo is, relationships first/business second.

    As for my own twitter – I have just recently re-joined. I have 300 tweets. I think 5 or so are my own writing/retweets of my posts….all others are retweets of others; now to be 301. lol

    Or not since twitter seems on the fritz.

  14. Keith Bloemendaal says:

    i guess I look at a relationship differently than some. I see it as networking first, where others call that “building relationships”.

    Now, I am not saying that it isn't possible to have a real relationship through social media, because I feel close to many of my social media “friends”, but I feel it is more of a business relationship, not personal. Even though I may not buy their products, or they might not buy mine, I still network with them and exchange ideas or help each other.

  15. geoffnow says:

    I think they (we) are mostly building relationships online to expand our sphere of influence, get the word out about our products / services, then to fill our bank accounts to the brim if possible. Social media is purely social for the majority and mainly monetary for the commercially minded. Small local business will eventually have to get into the Twitter game… Just my opinion. Geoff.

  16. geoffnow says:

    Relationships first… business second. Well put in a nutshell. :)

  17. thechaoscreator says:

    If I had a social media campaign, I would let you manage it. I like what you have done with the place. PS, it is still not allowing comments as Guest.

    The Chaos Creator™

  18. Tee Riddle says:

    You make some great points – trust is essential if you want to sell online, in my opinion. Once you gain a follower's trust you can sell them The Golden Gate Bridge.

    If they do not trust you then you better have a product they can't live without and make them believe they can't live without it.

  19. Tee Riddle says:

    I really don't understand a “fear of admitting to using social media to gain business” bit. Starbucks has one of the busiest Facebook Pages out there, but everyone automatically understands that Starbucks is in business to sell overpriced coffee and pastries, right?

    So why is there a fear to admit you have products you'd like to sell?

  20. Laptop Briefcases says:

    I definitely agree Keith. Unless you are a slacker, your first concern will be business when engaging in professional social networking. If your goal is just to make relationships/friends, your business goals will suffer. You need to maintain the right balance of friendliness and promotion.

  21. Laptop Briefcases says:

    That's ironic that he should say he is here to build relationships while using his commenting name to promote his website. Also if he were here to build relationships, you'd think his disagreement would be backed up with a little more opinion than that.

  22. webmaster seo says:

    I would say I'm trying to build trust at the moment. I also use it to learn from those smarter than me. I'm sure going forward I'll eventually expand my purposes on social media. I'm not trying to sell anything yet.

  23. Pete@Web Design New York says:

    As a business professional, you should ask yourself: “What business am I in?”. The answer is quite simple: if your business has anything to do with people – and ALL businesses do – you are in the business of building relationships. “Some people think that if they sell things, they are in the business of selling. They aren't. They are in the business of building relationships – because that's how you sell things.

  24. Rachael@pet friendly lodging says:

    When it comes to business and sales, building a strong relationship is critical. The stronger your relationship is with your customer, the more likely they will be to refer you business. Every day, make an attempt to build on the relationships you have with your customer. Don't just say hi as they walk in and goodbye as they leave. The last thing you want to do is make your customer feel like a statistic.

  25. Catering Sydney says:

    It's really hard to understand the habits of another generation but it's essential in becoming a part of their “communication life.”

  26. Catering Sydney says:

    An unhappy customer could maybe discuss their negative experience with a few of their friends, or the people they saw in their daily lives, but now social media has given customers a virtual soap box to voice their complaints to millions of people instantaneously.

  27. Sign Melbourne says:

    Personally I use T more as a way of collecting info / links to info rather than for building relationships. I suppose I'm a kind of passive tweeter…. or is that tweetee?

  28. Catering Sydney says:

    I think people feel more at eaze commenting on twitter is maybe they see it as a fun laid back place to post, and on a blog, they may see it as more professional and not feel like they have anything worthy of sharing.

  29. Cameron says:

    I believe it is to network and expand your reach. I have been able to use it in many different ways from getting help for myself or helping others by using my network of people. It all depends on what your main goal.

  30. rental mobil murah says:

    great article

  31. Electrician Melbourne says:

    In today's customer-driven economy, corporations must move from product-based campaign marketing to a customer-based relationship approach.

  32. webmaster seo says:

    I believe it is to network and expand your reach. I have been able to use it in many different ways from getting help for myself or helping others by using my network of people

  33. Catering Sydney says:

    Similar to what you’ve written that my most successful relationships come when I show interest in the other person first. When I give out, I get back and their is a mutual exchange in friendship.

  34. honda car mats says:

    I love to read such type of posts. Every day, make an attempt to build on the relationships you have with your customer. Don't just say hi as they walk in and goodbye as they leave. The last thing you want to do is make your customer feel like a statistic. I enjoyed reading this post a lot. I know that I need to find a way to convert my visitor into buyers. Reading this article gave me an idea on how to re target them. Thanks a lot.

  35. Plumber Sydney says:

    It's all in the approach in my opinion. If i approach a relationship from a mutually benefical stand point then it generally works out that way. Relationships for selfish purposes in all areas of life are doomed to failure.

  36. photo recovery says:

    Relationship is just a simple and broad term. It is generally based on trust, commitment. In today scenario relationship between company management and employees of company is necessary for successful business.
    Thanks for posting superb article.

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  38. Relationship Information says:

    As with all relationships whether online or in the real world, the main ingredient must be sincerity, openness and trust.

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